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Tips for Harvey Survivors, From Those Who Lived Through Sandy

A house in Bay Head, N.J., ravaged by Hurricane Sandy in 2012. Survivors of that storm now have advice for Texans starting to put their lives back together after Hurricane Harvey.Credit...Marcus Yam for The New York Times

Bathe your kids at their accustomed times. Use the gas of wrecked cars to fuel your generator. Beware of taking too much time off from your job. The sight of a squirrel might help.

Such are some of the storm recovery tips for the afflicted of southeast Texas from people in the calm of their own lives who have unfortunately been there, unfortunately done this. Their familiarity comes from having endured Hurricane Sandy, the deadly storm that punished the Northeastern Coast in October 2012, killing more than 100 people and flattening shore communities in New York and New Jersey. Seeing the devastation firsthand, they have wisdom on how to fight back from the brutality of Hurricane Harvey.

Elizabeth and Jeri Murphy lost their home in Seaford, N.Y., along with their cars and pretty much all their belongings. They had two young boys and Ms. Murphy was 37 weeks pregnant when they found themselves homeless, a condition that persisted for nine months. So they relied on social networks to reach out to people for places to stay.

“Take whatever help you can get, even if it feels uncomfortable,” Ms. Murphy said. “Do whatever is safe for your family.”

In the first month of picking up their lives, they stayed in eight different places before obtaining a rental while their house was rebuilt. Their flustered sons were 4 and 6, and to calm their jitters they did what they could to mimic familiar regimen. Baths at the same time, dinner at the same time, recording favorite TV shows.

“It wasn’t perfect, but we tried,” Ms. Murphy said. “Listen, there were days that none of us took showers.”

She added that while caring people will be looking to help, they won’t necessarily know what you most need.

“Be really specific,” she said. “We lost two cars. When friends and family asked what they could do, we borrowed a car for two months because you couldn’t find a single car to rent. You spend a lot of time waiting on the phone to get through to places. If a friend can wait on the phone for you, take the help.”

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A sight that would be familiar to those in Houston, happened on Staten Island during Hurricane Sandy. One survivor of that storm said seeing beloved possessions floating in oily water is “soul-crushing” — so try to focus on the memories they represent.Credit...Michael Kirby Smith for The New York Times

Be pathologically organized, several Sandy survivors suggested, as you advance into unmapped territory. Divide up the tangle of wearying tasks among family members to make them doable.

A dominant issue once the waters retreat is mold. Sandy survivors said to expect scores of mold treatment companies to flock to the area. Some will be disreputable and you need to be scrupulous in vetting them.

Many people suggested getting in touch quickly with your employer and exploring options. One woman lost her job of seven years because she took too much time off to deal with her issues. Employers are compassionate, she learned, but they have their limits.

Joelle Morrison was moving to a different home in Staten Island and virtually all of her belongings were in a storage place that was flooded. She lost keepsakes and things dear to her like almost 1,000 books. The stress led to a minor stroke.

“It’s hard to tell people in shelters to take care of yourself,” she said. “But I would say try to establish a routine and match it to your routine at home. Sleep the same hours. Make up your cot when you get up.”

Laughter and humor, she said, got her through the worst, as did finding delight in small things. “I’d look outside the window and see a squirrel popping along and I would smile at it, see his joy,” she said.

Sandy survivors spoke of nightmarish dealings with insurance companies while stooped in exhaustion. One family said that 90 percent of their claim was denied because of a cracked foundation. One woman said she still has five large tote bags full of the paperwork she gathered. She collected $90,000 on her $250,000 flood insurance policy. Everyone said take pictures, keep receipts, keep track of who you speak to.

And move quickly. Prathima Christdas, who lived in flooded Sea Gate, Brooklyn, lost her submerged car. When she called a rental agency, she found that she was on page 76 of the waiting list.

“Be prepared to know it will be a long haul,” she said. “There are streets in Brooklyn that haven’t been rebuilt from Sandy. There are houses that haven’t been rebuilt.”

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The streets of Lower Manhattan were dark for days after Hurricane Sandy swept through. One bit of advice survivors offered to those in Texas: use gas from ruined cars to power your generator.Credit...Damon Winter/The New York Times

In 1989, she experienced a magnitude 6.9 earthquake in California. “Given a choice between an earthquake in California and a predicted flood, I would choose an earthquake any day,” she said. “Because the government knows what to do.”

Improvise wherever possible was a lesson Christina Pontolillo learned. She also lived in Sea Gate and had no power. One neighbor had a generator that he shared with her and others. To keep it running, the neighbor siphoned gas from ruined cars before they were hauled away.

The advice of some Sandy survivors is that you may have to entertain leaving. Exactly a year after Sandy struck, one family, of all things, moved onto a sailboat.

Melissa Julien lived with her parents in Rockaway Beach, Queens, having just graduated from college. Everything in their basement and garage was destroyed. Beforehand, she feared that experiencing the hurricane would be the worst of it. She found out that coping with the aftermath was far scarier.

She saw some of her family’s treasured possessions adrift in sewage water: her mother’s wedding dress, baby pictures. She found the sight “soul-crushing.” But she learned to dwell on the memories from those objects.

Less than two years later, the cost of repairs and other issues being overwhelming, she and her parents relocated to Lehigh Acres, Fla., Last year, though, Ms. Julien, 26, moved to Brooklyn.

She dealt with it by telling herself to stay positive. “Just visualizing the future, that’s the big thing,” she said. “It really surprises you because it brings out a strength that you didn’t know you had. I don’t think you ever get over it, but you get stronger from it. It definitely will get better.”

Enormous patience is what the Walsh family learned. Stacey Walsh and her husband and their two daughters found their bungalow flooded in Broad Channel, Queens. Nearly five years later, their house is still not rebuilt. The latest estimate is next August. “You have to be forceful with your insurance company,” Ms. Walsh said. “Don’t take the first offer. Hold your ground and stand tough. Keep every receipt to the dime.”

And then, obviously, wait. They rented in Brooklyn for a year, then moved out to Riverhead, N.Y., where Ms. Walsh’s parents lived. They rent a house there now. Their daughters have been in four schools and no longer look forward to returning to Broad Channel. “You have to remind them that things will get better,” Ms. Walsh said. “Kids are resilient. You give them a tablet or a laptop and they’re O.K.”

The younger of their daughters, now 13, does not want to live near water again. Their hope is to sell the Broad Channel house once it is finished and settle elsewhere. “I hate to say it,” Ms. Walsh said, “but we were thinking about moving to Texas before all this.”

A version of this article appears in print on  , Section A, Page 19 of the New York edition with the headline: Sandy Survivors Have Recovery Tips for Texas. Order Reprints | Today’s Paper | Subscribe

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